Man Refusing to Be ‘Flexible’ Over Brother’s Family Vacation Demands Backed

A family is faced with an “it’s me or the dog” dilemma as a Reddit poster is refusing to go on a vacation if his brother’s dog also travels.

In a viral post shared by u/VcayThrowaway70707, a 33-year-old has explained he is the eldest of three, with his brother being 27, and his sister, 29. The trio usually go on a biannual trip with their parents and partners.

The family hasn’t been on the trip since 2018, but this year, the Reddit user’s parents have already booked a beach house in Florida. However, he no longer wants to go because his brother is bringing his dog, and he isn’t a fan.

A 2018 survey conducted by Rover, a dog-walking network, revealed 37 percent of pet parents have chosen not to travel so they could stay home with their dogs. And 38 percent of 500 participants have driven instead of flying to the destination, so their pet could also travel.

The poster wrote: “My brother has morphed into a self-described “dog dad” and based [on] social media seems to rarely do things without the dog. We live in the same city, but [in] different areas and we don’t see him all that much. The few times I’ve been around his dog it behaves fine. It’s too friendly for me and I can’t speak to how it behaves over multiple days or around babies.”

The poster explained he isn’t “a dog person” and certainly doesn’t want to travel with the pet on a plane. He also expresses his concerns about the animal being near his son.

He wrote: “My parents aren’t thrilled about it but “it is what it is”, those are my parent’s words. Our parents want to stay out of it and have us hash it out. I broached the topic with my brother. Essentially he isn’t flexible on the dog, it is his family and it is a family vacation. He says my 18-month-old will be far more annoying and loud than his dog. He seems firm on this and I’m ready to pull out of the trip. If I don’t go, the trip may fall apart.”

The Brothers Need to Set Boundaries, According to an Expert

Jack Hazan, a licensed psychotherapist, told Newsweek his opinions about the Reddit post, which has had over 11,000 upvotes since it was shared on March 4.

Hazan said: “My best recommendation for these brothers is to discuss boundaries. It sounds like both the 18-month-old baby and the small, overly friendly dog are non-negotiable guests for the family trip. So these brothers need to have an open, and honest, conversation about what each other is comfortable with, to establish ground rules.”

It turns out the Reddit user’s brother isn’t the only pet parent who refuses to go on holiday without their dog.

Hazan, the founder of Modern Therapy Group, based in New York, explained he has been in the same predicament when traveling with his Yorkshire terrier.

The author of the mental-health book Mind Over Batter: 75 Recipes for Baking as Therapy said: “I respect that not everyone (family or friends) may not want a dog around for the entire vacation. I try to make sure that he’s under control: outside if we’re eating, or surrounded by his toys and water in a playpen to keep him occupied. These brothers need to respect and understand each other’s lives and families because it’d be a shame for them to miss out on a family vacation over something that can easily be worked on.”

The original poster has been criticized by Reddit users, with more 5,000 commenting on the post.

The top comment, which has 44,300 upvotes, reads: “It’s a small dog and you said it was well-behaved. It’s fair to ask if the dog is kept away from the baby. A baby is far more inconvenient than a dog. You can leave a dog home alone for a few hours if people want to eat at a nice restaurant. It’s rude to bring a baby to a nice restaurant, they have bedtimes and they scream at movies. Kids are awesome- but you’re on a different planet if you think the vacation is going to revolve around the dog- it’s going to revolve around your baby.”

“As someone who absolutely loves being a mother more than anything in the world. That dog will be way less of an issue than a baby. He’s absolutely right,” wrote another parent.

Newsweek reached out to u/VcayThrowaway70707 for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.

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